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30 quotes by Bob Hope

Leslie Townes "Bob" Hope, KBE, KC*SG, KSS (May 29, 1903 – July 27, 2003), was an English-born American comedian, vaudevillian, actor, singer, dancer, athlete, and author. With a career spanning nearly 80 years, Hope appeared in over 70 films and shorts, including a series of "Road" movies co-starring Bing Crosby and Dorothy Lamour. In addition to hosting the Academy Awards fourteen times (more than any other host), he appeared in many stage...
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You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

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If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.

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I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom.

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A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

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I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

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I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

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I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap.

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When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things - not the great occasions - that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of... →

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A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

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If you haven't got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.

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People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

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The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

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If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

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