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Some women can be fooled all of the time, and all women can be fooled some of the time, but the same woman can't be fooled by the same man in the... →
A man snatches the first kiss, pleads for the second, demands the third, takes the fourth, accepts the fifth - and endures all the rest.
Don't waste time trying to break a man's heart; be satisfied if you can just manage to chip it in a brand new place.
Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.
Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever.
There's so much saint in the worst of them, and so much devil in the best of them, that a woman who's married to one of them, has nothing to... →
To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to... →
It takes a woman twenty years to make a man of her son, and another woman twenty minutes to make a fool of him.
One man's folly is another man's wife.
A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.
A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted.
It isn't tying himself to one woman that a man dreads when he thinks of marrying; it's separating himself from all the others.
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