Every dogma has its day.
Anthony Burgess
Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes.... →
Carol Burnett
I'm really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
George Burns
If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.
When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.
My favorite kind of humor is basically, if it was happening to you, it wouldn't be funny, but to observe it, it's hilarious.
Bill Burr
You know, it wasn't even that I'm a funny guy, I just loved stand-up comedy and I wanted to do it. It was one of the few things in my life... →
I still remember the first gig where I got people going, it was Rascals in New Jersey, and the place was packed. I was scared. People were expecting... →